The Mama and the Baby Bear Video

Date:  Jan 14, 2019

Jay has become a teenager now.  He is now learning how to blend into Secondary School life.

We the parents will need to do some adjustment ourselves too.


Just like the mama and baby bear climbing the snowy mountain video.

I love this video, as it send us a very clear message.

As parents, we have to learn how to let it go.  Our son has become a teenager, we have to let him try out all sort of things.  Most importantly, we have to stand aside.  Let him do things his own way.  Let him learn his way to grow up.

He has to learn how to take bus, walk to school.

He has to learn how to manage time, manage people, work with other students to do projects.  He have to learn how to respect everyone including himself.

And I just did what I said above.  Let him had all the freedom.  He has a iPhone to communicate with his friends.  He already learned how to “mute” or not to display banner from his Whatsapp.  The banner keep popping out, and you can’t really do real work when banner notifications keep popping up.  5000+ messages for a day is a lot.  He also learned when he do home work, leave the phone far away.

He also have a gaming iPhone as well as iPad.  But I am glad that Secondary School life is way busy then he thinks.  He only play less than 30 minutes before sleep.  He also keep is Learning Device (MacBook Pro) tidy and really use it to do work.

All I can guide him is to teach him the technique of Goggling.  Searching for info.  As for Chinese, I will use the Voice Memo to record my reading of the passage and guide him to listen to the recording every day to familiarise with the text reading and listening.

I did not install any parental control on any device.  As my teaching from young is to be a responsible kid.  They need to learn what is freedom, what is addiction, and stay far far away from addiction of gaming, of texting, etc.  They respect me, and thus they respect the house rules I set and happily obeying it.  That is why, I did not activate any parental control yet.

I also give him $50 for a week pocket money.  And I am sure he knows how to spent his money wisely.

I also don’t track where is he.  Will he come back for dinner.  He has his own life.  He will decide what he wants to do.

I also let him had 100% freedom to choose his CCA.   Although I propose him to join the Drama club.  hahahaha but I think he didn’t even considering it.  Hahaha.  I am interested to know after the 2 weeks trial classes he will be going, what CCA he eventually end up with.

There will be no Tuition for him until he cry for help.

As for outside activities.  I kept swimming for him, because I knew they like to talk to the ex-Pei Tong classmates during the swimming classes.  I kept Python/Robotics, a total 4 hours for Sunday and Saturday.  I still think The Lab @ Katong Village can teach him a lot of things.  I also keep the 2 hours badminton @ Singapore Badminton School at Chua Chu Kang every Sunday.  So, his week days are all free.

You know, I been thru my High School years.  And High School is where I had all my fun and where I learn to become a leader and a young man.  So, I know it is important to be like what my father and mother has given me.  100% total freedom.  And look at me now, I think I am doing quite OK.  Work OK, OK as a parent, etc.


Of course, he will make mistakes along the way.  In fact, he might make either a few or a lot a lot of mistakes.  But the cool thing is, you have to make mistakes to grow up, you have to make mistakes to become better.  We just make sure that we are close by when they need our help.  And just like the little baby bear, you might fell hard and fall many many times, but eventually, you will reach the top.  We just have to wait and wait and wait… until that time comes.



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